Conversations with a Con Artist

I am on my way out the door, kissing the babies bye bye when...

DING * DONG (BANG BANG BANG!!!!)

Con Artist as I am opening the door: Black coming at'cha! (as he lunges forward at me...he was a black guy)

Me: What?

Con Artist: Hahahaha, just kidding!

see he was trying to play the race card, if I was a little racist or sensitive enough not to want others to think I was... that comment might make me feel guilty and to prove I'm not a racist I would listen to him...except I don't fall for that crap.

Me: Okkkkaaay

Con Artist (now this guy talked a mile a minute and since I knew what he was up to I only half listened... so I didn't really catch all that he said): Hi I'm so and so with what and what...have you heard of us? No, well let me explain about what we do...

Me: Sorry, I'm just lea....

Con Artist: Sorry what did you say your name was (as he cuts me off)

Me: Diana, but I'm just lea...

Con Artist: Hi Diana is your mother or father home?

...SIGH...

NOW PEOPLE, I am not so vain that I need to be told I look sooooo young when I KNOW I don't. In fact, it's an insult. It means you think I am old...but young enough to be flattered by that line of doo-doo...plus you are insulting my intelligence.

Me: Oh please, give me a break

Con Artist: No really, are your parents home?

Me: *BIG SIGH* I own this house, and I am....

Con Artist...wish I could show ya'll how exaggerated this was...: hands shoot up to his mouth, he takes a step backwards and exclaims "NO! I SWEAR I HAD NO IDEA! YOU LOOK SO YOUNG! Now, what we do is..."

ME (pissed now because he is not listening to me, he expects me to listen but won't listen to me...I literally scream at him): HEY, YOU ARE NOT LISTENING TO ME! I AM ON MY WAY OUT, I DON'T HAVE TIME!!!

Con Artist: You don't have two minutes, what's two minutes of your time? It doesn't make a difference... (not valuing my time)

ME: NO, I DON'T!

Con Artist: Okay, thank you for your time...(as he cuts across my lawn to his next victim).

I think these con artists need new lessons in trying to fool people, cuz that guy just kept messing up, at least with me. I have had, since I was in college, about 7 of these people try to get my money. I have never fallen for it...even when I didn't realize fully what it was. I've screamed at about 4 of them now. 2 different people I know have fallen for it, and lost money. One friend lost about $40 buying "magazine subscriptions"...the other friend over $200 'investing' in a fake company, they had a fortune 500 magazine with a "pictured article" about them...I told him it was a con, he tried to prove it wasn't to me by buying the same magazine they showed him...sure enough their picture and article were not in the real magazine, he was pissed.

After the first two I had, I realized they all sound the same and say the same things. They always use flattery too. People, just be aware, and don't ever buy anything from anyone who comes to your door...not even girl scout cookies! Tell them you buy everything online...or do what I do and scream at them.